It’s the year 2078, your grandkids are proudly telling the story of how, thanks to the dirt-destroying power of Old Spice’s Hardest Working Collection body wash, you were the one who saved mankind from the intergalactic invasion that happened in… wait, PRECISELY TWO MINUTES FROM NOW!!!! WHAAAAAT!? QUICK! PUT THIS STUFF ALL OVER YOUR BODY NOW!!! Are you up all night worrying about whether or not this is a deep-cleaning body wash? Don’t lose any more sleep, because it is. No seriously, it is. So you can go back to dreaming about mermaid water polo, unlimited breadsticks, and a panther who can vacuum your house.